Ideas

So it has to be something which is amenable to complete newbies (so level one characters and a setting reasonably aligned with the expected D&D setting, magic system, power levels, et cetera)

Some kind of heist or similar job would be best, to not get bogged down in combat the entire session. Something like the grand dame or the big top circus sitch.

Possibilities:

• A regular-ish fantasy setting, but with flintlock and musket levels of firearms technology, set in a far western desert and heavily cowboy-coded. The PCs have to steal something from a crashed sandship.
  • Pitch is this: a huge sandship from the british east india trading company (or similar) ran into a tornado and then quicksand. Bandits are crawling all over it, skirmishing with company forces. You've been hired by some rich douchebag with an insane mansion or something to go in, grab the gold, and get out before the sandship sinks completely. And watch out for tornadoes.
  • Turns out, the gold isn't the only thing on the ship. There's also something with Plot Releveance$^{\textcopyright}$ inside the ship: a planar anchor. it can be used to open a hell portal.
  • They can side with the bandits or company men in various fights, or whoever's more convenient at any point. The two factions have their respective head honchos, as well as some more interesting people at play:
    • The village eccentric wizard, who lives in a rickety house on the edge of the canyon, who's heard from a friend in the city where the sandship came from that it's got some powerful magic onboard. A young man, completely in over his head.
    • The village sheriff, out to try and restore some order, though he's just one guy
    • A desert druid who's just waiting for the sandworm to show up
    • A group of holy pilgrims who won't pass up the opportunity to proselytize

Plans

General shape of the world:

• Eastwards is the city of Volundir, the gateway of the desert, and a normal fantasy temperate forest/european nation or five. Volundir is currently under the control of Lorrokan, an elven-run monarchy.
• Westwards is who knows what. There are rumours of a shining city called Laravin's Hope, though no-one has ever returned to tell of it.
• You're in the middle of the desert, in the small town of Geronimo, nestled in a canyon among a sizeable rocky formation. It's got all the things you'd expect: a sheriff, a small bank, a saloon, and a creepy old guy who lives alone in an enormous mansion at the top of the outcrop.

Pitch: You're a bunch of mercs, hired by the creepy old guy (an elf called Hieronymus). He's caught wind of a Royal Trading Company of Lorrokan sandship, the Theridiae, in stuck in quicksand some miles out, and needs someone to go and rescue the gold he's been waiting on - an inheritance from an uncle or something. But watch out for the bandits no doubt crawling over it, and the company men won't be happy to see you either.

Factions:

• Royal Trading Company of Lorrokan - the de facto supplier of a bunch of frontier towns in the desert, contracting out independently-run sandships to ship food and other supplies.
• Ravens - a colloquial name for the unorganised collection of semi-nomadic bandit caravans who survive off raiding transports, villages and oases.

NPCs:

• Hieronymus - creepy old elf, wearing a faded black-and-white tailcoat and top hat getup. Lives in the enormous mansion perched on top of the rocky outcrop, with a comically rickety set of stairs leading up to it. Comes from very old money, waiting on a shipment of gold from Lorrokan.
• Gavin Segal - middle-aged human, captain of the Theridiae. It's his ship and he's running a delivery contract for the RTCL. Extremely pissed that everyone's just turned up to loot a sinking ship, and would rather go down than leave.
• Xandar Fetterman - leader of one of uncountable semi-nomadic desert caravans which survive off raiding transports and villages. A burly half-orc with a rotten temper who's just looking to steal supplies and break shit.
• (PC) Alice - a twentysomething lanky half-elf, protege of the late town wizard Perrin. A bookworm through and through, but also a not-to-be-underestimated spellcaster. Lives on the edge of town in a highly rickety-looking and precarious house with a tower on one corner. Heard about a magical artefact on board the Theridiae and wants to investigate.
• (PC) Jack Johnson - a stetson-wearing, gunslinging town sheriff who takes no bullshit. He's out at the crash to try and stop the fighting, though he's not really up to much out beyond the town.
  • Replaced by Trish's character, an undead
• (PC) Robin - an enby tiefling and desert druid who occasionally shows up to buy supplies in town. Can be found sitting atop a dune watching the chaos unfold and waiting for a sandworm to turn up and munch the ship.
• Ramon Hernandez - the leader of a group of holy pilgrims of the god Lathandar, in search of Laravin's Hope, who happen to stumble across the Theridiae.

Plans, part 2

The pitch has changed a bit. Heironymus is still hiring you to go after the gold in the Theridiae, but it's also the supply ship for the town, and it's missing it's expected arrival time. old H will still know about the tornado and the quicksand, though.

As for NPCs, Jack Johnson is out, as trish is being the sheriff now. Alice and Robin are still around, though I'll only be making alice a character sheet since it looks like everyone's going to be coming in with their own.

So, the events of the session:

• They can either grab a bunch of giant lizards from the local stable or borrow/buy/nick a sandskimmer from a local; old H knows a guy with one. Then they head out in the direction of the oasis. It's a day or so on lizards or a couple hours on a sandskimmer.
  • If on giant lizards, they hit a random desert encounter before reaching the Theridiae (level 1-4, from page 94 of xanathar's)
• When they reach the sandship, they see a few things:
  • Everything's inside kind of a crater-ish structure,
  • The Theridiae's double hulls are tilted upwards and slightly diagonal. It is most definitely sinking, but quite slowly.
  • A bunch of lizards tied up to some posts hastily stuck in the sand, quite far from the ship. They also see lots of bandits around the ship, mostly chucking grapples up it while trying not to get stuck in the quicksand. Maybe fifteen or so, though some are stuck, some are desperately hanging onto the side of the ship, call it seven or so.
  • if they pay attention to the deck, they can see some company mercs frantically operating a ballista. If they don't, then a few minutes later, they see some bandits get nailed with it, or themselves if they're fighting the bandits. They then need to get on the boat themselves, somehow. If they're completely out of options, they can use the bandit's grapple ropes.

Once they're on board, they either need to convince the company men that they're here to help (unlikely) or fight those of them that remain (there's seven men alive on board, plus two operating the ballista). They then make their way down to the lower deck's cargo hold, and see captain segal and a few flunkeys guarding the gold and other trinkets, facing off against the bandit captain, Xandar. They can either convince one of the parties to side with them, fight them both, or somehow persuade both of them to give them the gold. (both of them are bandit captains with two bandits.) They can just about carry all of it all together, though they are slowed.

They can also elect to try and kick out the bandits and actually save the ship, which is achievable if they get the entire crew and all the grapples they can get their hands on to give it a go.

Eoin's mysterious sword is a sword of lifestealing, which he only realises if he crits. It's also from hell, and is mysteriously attracted to the planar anchor in the Theridiae's cargo hold.